Memories of Your Touch
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
by Wystii
Note: [Zechs's thoughts]
(Heero's thoughts)
{Wufei's thoughts}
~*~
flashback.
~**~
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Memories of Your Touch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ by Wystii Note: [Zechs's thoughts] (Heero's thoughts) {Wufei's thoughts} ~*~ flashback. ~**~ |
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~~~~~
["Be strong, be safe," she told me before pushing me into Nanny's arms. I never saw her again. She went to join Father.]
The young boy wanders farther into the lightly wooded area of an aristocrat's country estate, lost in his thoughts.
[I don't remember what she looks like anymore. Don't want to forget her.]Milli stops and looks around. [Zechs,] he reminds himself. [I'm Zechs now.] A small sigh escapes his pale lips. [It's deserted here. It always is. There's never anyone in these places who might recognize me. I've had to learn to look after myself since they sent Nanny away. I suppose that means I'm not a baby anymore.] He pouts. [I manage.]
[That's most of the grounds done. Nothing here but birds. Suppose it's better to be on the safe side and check.] The small revolver nestled against the small of his back reminds him of how safe he really feels. [Father would never approve. "Weapons are for the weak, who need them to feel strong," he used to say. I'm not strong. I'm scared. I've been scared since he... They told me that knowing how to protect myself would keep me safe. He wasn't scared, not even when that man held one of these to his head. I know. I saw the look in his eyes. It's nothing like what I see every time I look in the mirror.]
There's a rustle of leaves just behind Zechs, slightly to his left. Instinct takes over. With his heart pounding in his chest, his hand finds the gun and in a single fluid motion he is facing the intruder. [He's not scared.] Before him stands another youth, perhaps a few years older, holding out his bare hands as he steps forward.
"Stay back!" Zechs shouts, hands steady and revolver pointed towards the largest, hardest to miss part of the slim youth's torso, his chest. "Who are you? What are you doing here?" [His eyes, he's not scared.]
The ginger haired youth stops a few paces away. "I'm Treize Khushrenada," he replies. "This is one of my family's summer estates. My favorite since my doves are here," he explains, holding out a hand towards the birds perched in the trees. "They'll come to my call. Watch."
Zechs stares at the perfectly shaped hand and slowly lowers his weapon as his gaze follows the direction of slim fingers upwards. He hears the low whistle and a feather drifts towards him as the doves take off in a flurry of wings.
"See, here they come," Treize's words are softly spoken, his tone even and gentle. "Some of these I raised from chicks. I released them when I had to leave for the academy and they chose to stay on the grounds. There are nests in these trees and the grounds keeper lets them into the green house when it gets cold."
As the younger boy watches in stony, determined silence, pure white doves flock to the redhead, one tentatively settling on his arm for a gentle caress. Treize briefly meets the ice blue gaze in triumph before returning his attention to what is obviously his favored pet. "I come back here to spend time with them most summers."
[But I'm here, so you're not supposed to be.] Zechs fumes silently as oddly resentful feelings calm his fear. [No one spends time with me.] He is still at a loss for words to use against the silver tongued teen.
"Would you like company for the summer, Your Highness?" Treize asks, smiling mostly with his eyes, hinting at a secret shared.
Zechs's eyes widen as he gasps. "Don't call me that!" he snaps at the older boy.
"And why not?" is the counter argument. "It is your proper title, isn't it?"
"No!" Zechs shouts. "No, it isn't. There aren't any highnesses here. Cinqian titles died with the royal family of Cinq. They're all dead."
"Then, who are you?" Treize asks, looking unimpressed with the outburst.
"Nobody!" Leaning forward to make his point, Zechs retorts, "Nobody anyone should care to spend time with. Nobody you want to know."
"What a shame," Treize sighs, a sadness creeping into his voice. "I was looking forward to spending the summer with Milliard Peacecraft."
The name brings an odd ache to the young boy's heart, and memories of the last person to call him by the name he was given at birth. [Mother...] He could still hear her voice. ["Don't ever forget what you stand for, Milliard. You are a Peacecraft by name and by birth. Peace is your birthright. Be safe, be strong, and help the world find its way back to peace when you can."] Such were her last words to him. The anger and fire dies with his threatening tears. [I won't cry. Princes don't cry.]
"'Nobody' isn't a name." Treize steps closer to the sullen boy. "What's your name?"
Zechs lifts his face to look up at the older boy. He meets a gaze the color of the clear blue skies clouded by a sorrow that mirrors his own. "Milli... Zechs, Zechs Merquise."
"Well then, Zechs, welcome to my home." Treize waves his hand over the surrounding countryside before stepping forward and dropping to one knee and offering everything the wave had encompassed to the boy with his open palm. "Perhaps we can become friends over the summer and you'll let me call you Milli, since it is obviously a favored nickname." He tenderly traces the line of the boy's cheek from ear to chin with his fingertips.
[A friend...] Pale eyes widen to search those before him for an indication of sincerity behind the words. [He wants to be my friend,] he thinks with wonder seeing only an open offer of friendship in Treize's clear gaze. [I should refuse.] He shuts his eyes to bank the welling tears. [I can't...]
Reaching for the slim wrist, Zechs turns the hand cupping his cheek over and kisses the knuckles in an age-old gesture of respect and subservience. He opens his eyes to meet the now troubled gaze, daring the kneeling older boy to refuse his offer.
The clouds clear when Treize smiles. "We'll be the best of friends, Milli, you and I, for the rest of our lives."
End Part 1
~~~~~~~~
Part 2
~~~~~
Heero stares blankly at the receding planet, all blue and white. [Leaving for space again. Epyon is with the man it was built for. Wing Zero is mine. He thought it would show me the need for his death. That's why he gave me the beast in the first place. He wanted me to... With all the blood I've shed on earth... All the people I've killed... The only two people whose heads I've held my semi-automatic to are still alive. One, Rel... Symbolizes peace. The other, a man who sees his own death as the only way to end the war. I wouldn't kill him, I wasn't meant to. That night...]
~*~
Blood splashes onto pristine, pale skin as the dark-haired corpse falls to the ground. The once great general doesn't even blink nor does he move from his wanton pose on the bed. Dressed only in a bathrobe with one shoulder temptingly bare, his hands are flat on the bed, arms stiff, bracing his body upright, legs slightly spread apart, revealing the perfect lines of his thighs.The barest of smiles replaces his studiously blank expression as his eyes acknowledge the intruder.
Heero stares at the man on the bed. [That guard was about to...] "General," he growls, advancing closer to the bed. [This man led OZ to victory over the Federated Alliance. How can he just sit there and let...] "You ARE General Treize Khushrenada..." His gun is aimed and ready. [This man gave me Epyon.]
The general's tone is mild and oddly listless. "I should thank you for the inadvertent rescue. As a prisoner of war, one has to endure..." he pauses as blood drips from his chin, "certain inconveniences."
[This man...] Lowering the gun to his side, Heero stops in his advance. [...has stopped fighting.]
"And please, just Treize will do," the barely clothed man on the bed says. "I've been relieved of my command, as you well know. Why have you returned?"
Heero kicks the body aside to stand in its place. [This man is not my enemy.] Placing the barrel of the gun under the aristocratic chin, he tilts Treize's head upward to look directly into his eyes. [Do you still want to die?] "I came to talk to a General."
Heavy lidded eyes regard the Gundam pilot. "I have nothing left to give you."
[Nothing...] Leaning forward, Heero closes his eyes and encounters moist, supple lips. After only a moment's hesitation, his tongue is granted access to the warmth of the older man's mouth. He opens his eyes to see firmly closed eyelids, long ginger lashes resting against pale cheeks. There is no other response to his probing, just unfeigned submission that tastes bitterly of defeat. [You'll let me take but you won't give.] One hard shove and Treize is flat on his back. [How many others have taken this from you?]
The young pilot springs onto the bed, straddling the prone man and bracing the gun on his forehead. "What happened to the mighty General Khushrenada of OZ?" Heero sneers.
Treize stares past the gun at his assailant. "Have you come to kill me?" he asks, closing his eyes.
Prussian blue eyes study the man beneath his weapon. [No.] "You haven't answered my question." He is strangely aware of the vulnerability of the man beneath him, the feel of that slim body between his knees. His gaze is drawn to the long slender line of an exposed neck. [You no longer fight...]
"Your gun is already at my head. Please... As long as I live, this war won't end. Surely, Epyon..." Treize swallows the rest of his words. "You, of all the gundam pilots should be able to see the need for my death."
[No.] Heero glares at his captive. [You are not my enemy.]
Treize opens his eyes to face his chosen executioner. "It's the only way to achieve peace." Tears, no longer held back by closed lids, escape to trail down the side of his face. "My Milli will follow me in death if he is forced to do the deed," he says in a barely audible whisper.
Heero freezes at the sight of those tears, slowly assimilating Treize's words. [His Milli... Milliard Peacecraft... Zechs Merquise. He gave me Epyon to save Cinq for his Milli... Are they...]
Sounds of voices raised between soldiers outside the locked door of the bedchamber snap Heero out of the surreal daze Treize's demeanor and words had drawn him into. He glances quickly at the door. [No alarms...] Heero scrambles backwards off the bed.
A sharp intake of breath is Treize's only reaction as the barrel of the gun leaves his forehead.
Heero turns to leave as the man on the bed braces himself up on his elbows. [Didn't ask, but... no need to anymore...]
"If you don't do this... now, s... someone else will have to," that soft, cultured voice calls to him. "Someone who will do it to achieve peace for both earth and the colonies. You have no great love for me, it shouldn't be that hard for you to do what needs to be done."
[Peace... it's what that family stands for.] Heero stops and looks back. "And what if Epyon shows him a different way to end this war?" [It wasn't meant to be mine...] His eyes widen with sudden understanding. "You built this for..." [Zechs. This beast is his.] He catches the ex-general's gaze with his own. "You've stopped fighting, Treize. Epyon showed me who my enemies are. I know now whom I must kill. You are no longer my enemy. I won't kill you."
A slight understanding and great sadness fill Treize's eyes as he lowers his gaze and sits up. "You're a lot like him," he whispers. The slight smile that plays on his lips contrasts sharply with the bowing of his head.
"I came to find out what I'm supposed to do with your gundam," Heero states, ignoring the whispered words. "Now I know. For that, I thank you. You did have something left to give me, after all."
"You're welcome." Long aristocratic fingers reach up to touch the still intact forehead and shield the handsome face from further scrutiny.
"For what it's worth, Treize," Heero continues, "Epyon lies. It warps the truth to erase your doubts." [And in doing so, it lies in the same way the Zero System does.]
"It shows you your destiny," the man on the bed insists as his head hangs even lower. "You don't understand. My fate..."
"Don't I?" Heero cuts off any further explanation. "You're wrong." He pauses for one last look at the deposed leader of OZ. "Zechs's fate will be his own, Treize. You can't protect him from yours."
[Zechs will see his own path and face his own fate and there's nothing you can do about it. We will finish our duel. I couldn't save Cinq for him but I gave him Epyon. Your gift to your champion. I believe he was on his way to see you when we parted ways... could read the intention in his eyes when he gave me Wing Z... At least he knows you love him.]
"Then I proposed to Miss Relena Peacecraft. She gave me the filthiest look and pulled out a fucking big gun and pointed it at my forehead and said, 'I'll kill you!' in that whiny screechy voice of hers..."
"What are you talking about, Duo?" Heero asks without looking away from the blue orb floating in space.
"I knew mentioning Her Majesty would get your attention," Duo barks at his co-pilot. "I've been rambling nonsense since we left the atmosphere and you only just notice. So, penny for your thoughts?"
A small, secretive smile plays across Heero's lips as he says, "Just wondering what might be happening in Luxembourg tonight. That supposed prison is very easy to get in and out of. If I were Zechs, would you be my Treize?"
"What?" Duo splutters. "Don't even compare us to those OZ nutcases. Besides... I'm the one with the hair!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, back on Earth in a certain prison, a handsome young officer taps his foot impatiently as the soldier rechecks his list.
"But Sir, you aren't listed as a visitor or an interrogator of the prisoner," the prison guard insists.
"Then your list is obsolete and needs to be updated. Are you questioning my authority to carry out MY orders?" The tall blond in the red uniform jacket looks unimpressed as he crosses his arms. White-gloved fingers drum against his elbow. "Well?"
"No, Sir! I'll show you to his Excellency's rooms immediately, Sir!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Heero returns his gaze towards the planet they are leaving. "And I'm the one who keeps breaking into prisons for you," he mumbles under his breath.
End Part 2
~~~~~~~~
Part 3
~~~~~
[Cinq is lost again. At least Relena is s... still alive. The last Queen... mother...] "I don't remember what she looks like anymore," Zechs says to the blank screen in Epyon's cockpit. Here, within the powered down mobile suit, he allows the memories to wash over him, quietly talking to an absent friend. "Yet I can't forget the way Father looked the last time I saw him. He still haunts my nightmares." The silence that follows is deafening as he loses his willingness to speak. "Treize, you will too," he continues after what seems like an eternity, "because I'll remember you. The way you look, feel, smell... from that very first time we met. I've watched you change from a commander of birds to a leader of men. They flock to you. We follow you as you lead us to your destiny."
Leaning back in the pilot's seat, Zechs closes his eyes. The cockpit is dark except for a single red indicator light. He draws a deep breath and continues. "But I remember a handsome boy on the deserted grounds of a country estate. My first friend and perhaps my last. My only friend..." [I've come back to you.] He opens the hatch. [Please don't send me away again. This war is no longer ours. No one here cares about the peace we are fighting to make desirable. Cinq is lost. I will be lost if you won't lead me. I need you, my friend. Don't send me away again.]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'll be interrogating the prisoner all night. Be sure no-one interrupts me," the newly arrived officer orders as he stops by the door to the ex-general's rooms.
"Yes, Sir!" The Sargent salutes, a knowing look in his eyes and a barely concealed smirk on his lips. "There'll be no interruptions, Sir." He holds the door open for the handsome Lieutenant.
[Too easy.] Zechs stops and waits for the locking mechanism to slide into place behind him. [That smirk...] He shudders, refusing to follow that train of thought to its natural conclusion. [No more.] Approaching his friend, his steps falter as his resolve strengthens. [I won't leave you again.] His eyes are drawn to the straight back and tense shoulders. [I won't leave without you.]
"Another all night interrogation?" Treize drawls, every word dripping sarcasm. He is standing by the large lattice window, back to the room and his visitor. Immaculately dressed in his royal blue uniform, he looks every inch the General that he was.
"Another?" Zechs echoes, attempting to emulate the sarcasm. Returning to a more respectful tone, he continues, "There won't be another. I'll see to it. I'm here and ready to serve you again, Your Excellency."
A sudden stiffening of Treize's posture and a hitch in his breath betrays him even though his voice retains its sarcastic edge. "Surely you don't mean to place yourself under house arrest just to keep me company."
"We don't have to be here to be together," is the even, quiet retort.
White-gloved fingers touch the windowpane at those words and Treize slowly turns to face his returned second. "You want me to leave with you?"
[You need a reason?] Zechs steps closer to his general. "This war is beyond us now," he says, holding out his hand, searching clear blue eyes for a hint of encouragement. "You walked away from it when you surrendered your command. Cinq is lost. Again. I'm defeated." The bleakness in those eyes pushes him to say more, the words tumbling out in a desperate rush. "This war is over for the both of us. We can leave it to those who want to fight. We can make our own peace in hiding. Neither of us needs to be here."
A tentative hand is placed in Zechs's open one and red lashes lower to gaze at their joined hands. While nothing is said, it is enough to give him the courage to reach for Treize's cravat, to gently pull at it, bringing the slender man into the circle of his other arm.This... this man, his friend and lover, whose arms slip over his shoulders and encircle his neck, fingers tangling in his hair.
The moment lasts an eternity as they stare into each other's eyes, eyes that close as their lips meet and they melt against each other, savoring the brief ecstasy as their souls touch.
Even eternity has to end, and Treize reaches for the hand still holding his cravat, pressing it against his wildly beating heart. He allows his other arm to slide down the well-muscled back and rests his head on the familiar shoulder. His gasps for air slow to deep, even breaths.
"Please say we can do this," Zechs pleads. "No one will think to look for us before morning, late morning, and we can be anywhere by then. We'd never have to be apart again. We'll decide on new names and make a new life for ourselves. We can be who we are and not the soldiers this war has forced us to be. No one wants this peace we're fighting so hard to give them. There's nothing more we can do..." he falters in the face of Treize's continued silence. "I won't leave without you." He slowly becomes aware of the gentle rubbing motion down his back and holds his tongue. [There is nothing more I can say...]
"We're not going anywhere." The cultured voice is calm and soothing, even as the meaning of these words slowly sinks in. "The war won't end just because we choose to walk away. We might not have started this but we WILL end it. We will show them such despair that they will crave the peace your family stood for. This we can still do."
Zechs's eyes widen and his heart skips a beat.
Treize turns his head slightly to press his lips against the base of Zechs's neck, just below his ear. He allows the taller man to feel his smile before whispering, "We have all night. I want us to be together. I want you inside me tonight. Remember the first time I showed you how? We were both so young..."
[He's doing it again.] Zechs struggles against those soft words even as they draw him into the past, dredging up memories of that first time. [He always does this. Every time we part...]
[It's always been this way, for as long as I've known him, as long as we've been friends.] An old anger surfaces to keep those insidious memories at bay. [I'm always left behind when his duty calls. He'll hold my hand, explain it all to me, distract me at the very last moment and convince me of his vision.] Yet, an older understanding drains the false strength the anger provides. [His visions are like silken threads of fate woven into a supple ribbon, binding him to his destiny stronger than any chains of gundanium could.] Cold desperation claws at his heart. [He allows it to wrap around him and he calls it duty and honor and refuses to let it bind me to him. Can't he see that all I want is to let his ribbon bind us together? If I'm with him, I can face anything. I can do anything he asks of me. Instead, he leaves me behind to flounder and try to guess at what he needs from me.]
The journey from the hall into the bedroom is a blur, Zechs following the soothing sounds of Treize's words as the years fall away. [I'm not the King he thinks I should be. Milliardo Peacecraft died with his parents in the first fall of Cinq. It's who he wants me to be but I am only the boy he calls Milli who loves him. Why can't he see that? I can try... I have tried... just for him. Why is he leaving me again? What does he expect me to do? Why won't he just tell me? Then... I won't have to guess. I just want to be with him. He won't let me stay. He is making me leave. I don't understand why, this war is over for both of us. I just...] They reach the bed, leaving a trail of discarded articles of uniform behind them.
While Treize lies back, Zechs crawls between his spread legs to reach for his slowly hardening member. Treize closes his eyes and drapes a leg over the broad shoulder. Soft, wet warmth engulfs the tip of his penis; he gasps as a thumb trails the vein and a hand wraps about the base. "Milli..." he breathes, "Milli, look at me."
The pale blond head lifts and the stroking hand stills. Ice blue eyes lock onto those of a deeper shade.
Treize seals his lips in a tight line, his eyes ordering, demanding that this gentle foreplay end.
"There isn't any..." Milli explains, trailing off at the determined expression on his lover's face. "I thought to use..." again he stalls. "How do you want it?" he finally concedes as the slim man beneath him braces himself upright to face him down.
"Hard and fast, NOW," the General orders through gritted teeth before falling backwards as the Lieutenant slams his member all the way in one swift push of his hips. Treize grunts as the pain brings tears to his eyes.
[Why are you making me hurt you? Why does it have to be like this?] The blond tries to convey in his gaze, as he leans closer, the words he knows he isn't allowed to say. [This will break me before it breaks you.]
Treize's eyes widen. "Again," he says without breaking eye contact. He moans softly as the man filling him withdraws most of his rock hard length before slamming it home a second time. "Again," he gasps, resolve dimming as he is explicitly obeyed a third time. "Milli, hold me," he breathes, arms finally wrapping themselves around his lover's shoulders, drawing them closer. "Gently, just rock me."
Milli plants his knees on the bed. With his hands on Treize's buttocks, he lifts the man still wrapped around his cock into his lap and slowly they rock back and forth.
This languid rhythm soon has Treize flushed and panting. "See," he says softly, his tone even and gentle. "You just have to trust me."
[I remember you. I remember this tone in your voice. It's the one you use to call your birds...]
~*~
Zechs stares at the perfectly shaped hand, fingers slightly curled, as it is held out towards the birds approaching in a flurry of wings.
"See, here they come," Treize's words are softly spoken, his tone even and gentle. "Some of these I raised from chicks. I released them when I had to leave..."
~**~
[It's the tone you always use to calm my fears. It's the hand you always offer me when you want me to follow your lead.]
~*~
"But can't you delay it, just one day?" A teenage Zechs insists, wondering how his shirt can look so big on his older friend.
"That's exactly why I want to give you your present tonight," Treize reiterates, getting on his hands and knees, placing a long fingered hand on the younger boy's thigh as he leans forward to kiss a sulky cheek. "I want you inside me, tonight. You'll be the first person to ever take me that way."
"But I like you inside me," the blond whispers. "I wouldn't know what to do."
"Trust me," Treize says, tangling his fingers with his friend's, his thumb caressing the callused palm. "You just have to do exactly as I tell you."
Ice blue eyes widen as he realizes that he isn't being teased. "You're changing the subject again." Zechs pouts. "Do you HAVE to leave for L3 tomorrow? It's my sixteenth birthday."
"We'll go slow," the redhead reassures the his young lover. "I've never given myself to anyone else. You're the only one I'd ever want to have me this way." His blue eyes darken at the possibility of rejection. "I thought it would be a perfect sweet sixteen present for you," he explains. "I've waited an awfully long time for you to grow up."
"You waited for me?" Milli asks, mesmerized by the movement of Treize's lips and the tone of his voice, the impending trip forgotten.
"Just for you. I'll give myself to you, tonight."
"Faster, Milli, I'm so close." Treize rests his arm above his head, hand clutching at the sheets.
Zechs increases his pace, reaching the edges of his own endurance with the pounding rhythm. [I shouldn't have let you talk me into doing this. You only seem to want me this way when you know we have to...] A cascade of sensation overwhelms his senses as he climaxes and spills his seed deep inside his lover's body.
Clenching his fist around the sheets, Treize arches up to meet Zechs's final thrusts. He keeps his eyes firmly closed as warm white fluid splashes on their stomachs and chests.
[He won't even look at me now.] Studying the man beneath him, Zechs memorizes every detail of that handsome face, caught in the throes of ecstasy and... [Concentration?]
Treize's eyelids lift, only a fraction, as he sighs. Releasing the sheets, his hand reaches up to cup a flushed cheek for barely a second before returning to its place above his head. His eyes close again and his face turns to the side, away from the man above him.
Zechs can only stare, caught up in his own thoughts. [You used to love touching me with your bare hands, tracing your fingertips across my cheek and cupping my face as you scream my name. It's not that way anymore. You regretted the touch as soon as you felt my cheek against your palm. You won't even look at me tonight. I don't understand what is happening to us.] He reaches down to hold Treize's warm cheek in the palm of his hand. There is no answering pressure, no reaction at all. [Why won't you touch me anymore? What have I done to turn you away from me? I'm sorry... I just want to make this right between us but...]
Leaning forward, Zechs gathers the still form in his arms and sits up. He presses his lips to the sweat damp forehead while settling the unresisting body against his own, on his lap. [I miss you. I'm here holding you but you're far away, somewhere else, perhaps with someone else. Have you found another more worthy of your love? Was I meant to be someone else tonight? I'm sorry I'm not whom you want with you, holding you, loving you.]
"I'll leave," Zechs whispers. [If that will make you happy again, I'll leave] Staring at the body in his embrace, he waits for some sign... any indication of whether... Only Treize's slow, even breathing and the warm skin touching his own assures him that his lover is still alive. "I'm sorry," he murmurs. [I can't read your mind the way you see into my soul with your touch. But you won't touch me anymore. You don't want to know me anymore. All I ever wanted was to please you, so I'll do as you want.] "I'll leave," he repeats when he gets no response. This time, his voice is clear and audible. "I'm sorry." [What have I done? I'd say, "don't leave me" but it's too late, isn't it? You're already gone.]
"I'll do as you ask." There is a toneless quality to Zechs's voice that is echoed in ice blue eyes devoid of hope. "I'll find a way to teach them all despair."
[I will show them such despair as we... as I know and they will join us... join me in this dark place until they beg you for peace. Milliardo Peacecraft will die to end this war. I will die with him this time.]
"Just..." His arms tighten around the man in his embrace. "Let me hold you tonight."
[I won't live without you.]
End Part 3
~~~~~~~~
Part 4
~~~~~
{Ten years. It's been ten years since I killed the strongest man I've ever met. I have yet to meet his equal except perhaps...} Wufei sighs and struggles to sit up. He opens one eye and realizes that he's alone. "At least I didn't kill him," he informs the sleeping cat draped over his left leg.
It flicks an ear at him and swats his hip with its tail without lifting an eyelid.
"Still, I think Treize was stronger." Achieving an upright position, he is reminded of the previous night's debauchery. "Ugh, I don't feel strong this morning," he moans, burying his face in his hand. {Dreamt of him last night. All Une's fault.}
~*~
"The situation is getting rather tense between China and Russia," Lady Une says over the vidphone. "Everyone is nervous. Sally assures me that you aren't involved in local terrorist activities. But you are an ex-terrorist. All the other pilots are already affiliated with the Preventers. It would make a lot of delegates in the United Earthsphere Government more comfortable if you were associated with us in some way. I don't expect you to join us as an active agent, unless you want to, of course. Perhaps you could join us as a trainer. I can send a few agents to your martial arts school as part of a special hand-to-hand training course and you won't even have to relocate. It will cement your ties to us and calm a lot of fears among the politicians."
"I don't think I can work for you, Lady Une, considering our past conflicts. I explained this to Sally when she asked me to join up eight years ago."
"It's been ten years, Mr Chang. Let me assure you that I bear you no grudges. I bore none eight years ago but I was willing to respect your decision. The situation has changed. You are located in an unfortunate part of the world. You are who you are and your past choices in affiliations are making a lot of very influential people very uneasy about your current unaffiliated status. Will you at least see the agent I send to present you with the ways you can be involved with us without becoming an active agent? I would pay you a personal visit, but I can't leave headquarters at the moment and it is imperative that you join us as soon as possible."
"I'll see your agent."
"Thank you, Mr Chang. A Preventer you'll recognize will be on your doorstep within the hour."
{That was three days ago. I've dreamt of Treize every night since. He's always walking away from me.} Opening his eyes, Wufei realizes that the room is still spinning at an alarming rate. {How much did I drink last night? There was a crate of his favorite red. Surely we didn't...}
Une's determined countenance remains etched in his memory. {How can she not bear me a grudge? She must be deluding herself. I bear me a grudge. And yet, she is trying hard to maintain this fragile peace. Perhaps...}
Onyx eyes close again when the room refuses to stop spinning. {I was so young and so angry at being his chosen executioner. And he did choose me, of that I'm now certain. So many things I didn't know for so long. His death has shaped the past ten years of my life. All my doubts... All my regrets...}
An image of Treize imposes itself onto his mind's eye. A handsome man in a royal blue uniform jacket and a flowing cape. {I'm always looking at him from behind. Must he be forever walking away from me?}
He opens his eyes wide to banish the image. {He put his sword to my throat and touched my soul. I still remember the look in his eyes that night when he called me his Dragon.} Instead, another replaces it with a triumphant sparkle in deep blue eyes and a smug set of sealed lips. {How can I feel such things for a man I've never really known? A man I only dueled. A man who should have been my enemy... who was my enemy. Why does his ghost haunt me so? Was it the mystery? Are we so alike? He seemed...}
A timid knocking on the front door, echoing thunderously in his head, snaps him out of his reverie.
"Master Chang! There's a Preventer wandering around the village looking for you," a young male voice calls through the closed door. "Ah Mun is giving her the run-a-round. Old Seng sent me to warn you."
"Thank you," Wufei manages to rasp, cringing at the sound of his own voice. "Please delay her for as long as you can." {It's Noin. It must be Noin.}
"Sure. You know Ah Mun, you have a few hours." Footsteps recede from his doorway.
"I'll need a few hours," he whispers, putting a fist to his mouth in an attempt to hold down what little he had eaten the previous day. {Time to get up.}
The haughty image of a certain redhead remains throughout his morning routine. {This man touched a place in my heart I didn't know existed. Had he lived...}
Emerging from the bathroom already dressed, he sits on the edge of the bed with a brush in his hand. {He is dead.} Long, sure strokes brush out his waist length hair. {In the hearts and memories of those who loved him, he will never be older than I am now. It is time I let another into that sacred place in my heart. Someone I can love, cherish and protect from the coming conflict.} Wrapping the bulk of his hair in silken ribbon to form a long tail, he ties it off neatly.
{I will never forget him.} Wufei stands and flicks his neatly wrapped length of hair over his shoulder. {His strength and conviction have shaped my present; his greatest love will shape my future.}
End Part 4
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